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November 23, 2020

HEN1 kicked from yet another team, NA loses yet another org and DreamHack creates yet another masterpiece. Oh and North lost to yet another Danish team. What else is new.

Zyw1mple is the GOAT

Illustration by NovaH. Source: Epicenter

We were so, so ready to talk about how s1mple was the best player in the world, inarguably.

After two maps, NaVi were 2-0 up and s1mple had over 60 kills. He was extraordinary in those first two, and it looked like that Vitality Grand Final curse was coming back to bite them again.

We had it all written out. s1mple is the GOAT, Zywho, finally s1mple has a team around him, all that stuff.

But man, ZywOo. Jesus Christ.

The thing is, statistically, s1mple still slaughtered Vitality. The poor guy dropped 118 over the five maps and it still wasn't enough. If anyone is cursed, it's that guy.

Vitality came out of nowhere to reverse sweep the finals 3-2, but we're no closer to completely deciding who is the bestest player ever ever ever. s1mple put up the numbers, but ZywOo had the magic moments, and importantly, the virtual trophy to show for it.

Sort of lost in all this is how insanely good Nivera is. Every time he plays, he looks like he's not far off the level of ZywOo. Really makes you wonder why he doesn't play every game. At least he gets more game time than Bubzkji, who is basically a modern day Winston Bogarde.

And if you don't get that reference, we can't blame you. It's a bit of an odd one.


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Here lies HEN1 and NA

Ah, HEN1.

Just when things were finally looking up again, and your stock was rising. Just when you actually looked like the best AWPer in Brazil, just when you'd found consistency, you get replaced by a guy with a perm who spells 'Payton' with two 'y's.

And it's for 'outside of the server issues', because of bloody course it is.

It's a great opportunity for a talented AWPer, though, to move to a genuinely quality team - but it's another exodus from a promising NA team. It follows news that the New England Whalers players will become free agents, and there are rumours of another Triumph player leaving too for the other game.

With Liquid and EG losing to rosters that are imploding (supposedly; Chaos retweeted this suggesting the rumours of them splitting up was true), NA CS is in the worst position it's been since mOE was vaguely respected in the scene.

At least their only Major winning organisation haven't picked up a team with more UK players than NA ones... oh. Never mind.

Is... is UK CS in a better spot than NA CS?


Walking in a DreamHack Winter Wonderland

Except this one replaces mistletoe, snow and arguments about politics with shooting, bombs and death. Lovely.

If you aren't in the mood for yet another CS:GO tournament, just watch the trailer for the event.

Better? Good. If you care for things like that, there are 8 references in it - can you find them all?

Alright now that that's out of the way, let's get straight into the groups. Group A is packed with all sorts of teams; teams that disappoint - like ENCE and c0ntact for example - teams that are up and coming - Spirit and Gambit come to mind - and top contenders - think Heroic and Complexity.

Personally we'll pay close attention to Spirit and Gambit, and especially the latter. This is their moment to shine, and frankly CIS upsets never get old. Gambit have shed their Youngsters skin and are looking for a fight. You can't blame them with the ratings the team gets. ez katka.

Group B is a completely different story. Two clusters arise, the teams that are, and the teams that aren't. On the former we find G2, Liquid, Astralis and FURIA. Although shaky at times, they're the top dogs. Or top samurai, unicorn, random shape around a star, and panther. The latter is made up of GODSENT, mousesports, Sprout and North. **All teams in stormy waters, looking for some much needed tailwind. How poetic.

We suggest you keep an eye on mousesports, who might lose an IGL, and GODSENT, who just gained a new one. Budget FaZe's looking to reinvent themselves.


Absorb his knowledge like a SPUNJ

First, some quick roster updates:

  • FURIA might've made a very good choice in picking (a) junior, inexperience doesn't matter when you get the kills.
  • From Besiktas to Originem to XSET. If you think we're talking about a no-namer football player, then you're dead wrong. It's the head shooting ladies.
  • WorldEdit, our favourite CIS player nickname, has left pro100, and it would seem that with it, he has world edited the team out of existence.

Now to some headlines from around the world:

  • It's official, the banter filled diggity caller also known as SPUNJS is the Best Esports Analyst of 2020.
  • BLAST just got themselves another big bag of money, to expand into the international markets.
  • mithR reassures us he's not about to try to teach an established and respected IGL how to call. Good.
  • Renegades is back to winning events, beating {random_oce_or_asia_team#42} to win {oce_or_asia_event#19}.
  • Twitter user @koi_csgo is looking to find out more about the psychology of CS:GO with an emphasis on emotion. Do him a solid and help with his research. We'll be sat here crying over the last three losses in the meantime.

And finally some short videos you don't wanna miss:


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