Sent on
February 23, 2023

We know ragging on EG is old news, but they just make it so easy for us. Don’t worry, we’ve found plenty of space to mock fnatic and NaToSaphiX, too.

The EG saga continues

Source: EG

If you don’t laugh, you’ll cry.

And we most definitely choose to laugh.

Evil Geniuses are everyone’s favourite punching bag, and they don’t make it difficult either. From their self-assured back-patting of themselves when they win a game, to Ryan trying to defend them on Twitter, to them just being awful, and American, it’s very easy to dislike them.

Speaking of them being awful, they won’t even be at the RMR.

They snuck through 3-2 to the qualifier, but were then swiftly fell by the blade of malbsMd, and TeamOne. We mention malbs because he dropped 63 kills in 59 rounds, with over 100 ADR and a 1.57 rating. That’s a body.

Still, it could be worse.

They could have signed junior to be an AWPer for the team, or something. Alright fine, it’s for one of the academy teams, but it’s still not exactly a huge, exciting signing either.

Or we guess, hmm, we don’t know, a player on a different NA team whom they had tried to sign in the past could have called their management “some of the worst management I think I have ever talked to”.

That would be embarrassing.

Still, at least Pro League is going well for them. They almost won a map against Eternal Fire, and got almost double figure rounds against Cloud9. Over two maps. And the pipeline is working too, with wiz and HexT combining for 26 kills in the series. With 35 deaths each.

And by almost won a map vs Eternal Fire, we mean they were 13-2 down and lost 16-14, which is somehow even funnier than just losing 16-2.

Whatever the Blueprint is supposed to be building, it isn’t. Whether the drawing is skewiff or the builders are drunk, it’s less Empire State Building and more London Bridge.

Author: 
aizyesque

Want the next edition in your inbox?

  • Get all the best stories in a quick read, twice weekly
  • We're cheeky and snarky a.f.
  • It's free, forever!
subscribe now

Publicly undefined

Illustration by ANDYJ. Source: NaToSaphiX, kRYSTAL

Despite playing together from the start of the year, undefined has finally “gone public”.

In December, IGL AcilioN released a statement saying an organisation had pulled out of signing the undefined boys at the very last second. Since then, they’ve been playing unsalaried on their mix team trying to qualify for any event they could. Most recently they’ve made it into the online CCT South Europe Series 3, their first showing at a non-qualifying event.

This may be why the team has decided to “go public” AKA talk to the press.

NaToSaphiX’s tweet was the first announcement of their willingness to talk to anyone who’ll listen. Along with that, he tweeted the team's roster. Including ex-EC Brugge hard carry ritchiEE who’ll look to bring the fragging to undefined.

Another interesting addition to the team is kRYSTAL in his first coaching role. kRYSTAL used to be a low-fragging IGL lauded for his ability to make a team. All of that should bode well for his transition into coaching. Can’t bottom frag if you’re not fragging at all.

Much like their name, this team's future is undefined. Who knows what they can achieve, kRYSTAL has the ability to develop players and teams. Realistically, they won't win much or be tier 1 contenders; But if any of the players can launch their careers (again) they’ll consider it a success.

Undefined consists of:

  • AcilioN (IGL)
  • NaToSaphiX (AWP)
  • Bibu
  • JedqrC (stand-in)
  • ritchiEE
  • kRYSTAL (coach)
Author: 
Horizzon

Kassad, famed hater

Tune in to this week's episode of Overtime on Inferno where your favorite hosts aizyesque and Logan Ramhap go deep on the biggest news in CS:GO:

  • Kassad’s evil genius
  • Why XANTARES is going to bang EG out
  • Why fnatic are going to be rubbish
Author: 

sh1ro hands G2 a paddling

Source: Cloud9

In the real matches (the ones without EG) there was almost some good Counter-Strike going on.

Not from G2, though: Their 13-match winning streak was broken by a re-invigorated Cloud9.

Of course, that doesn’t really matter. G2 still have two chances in ESL’s triple elimination bracket to make playoffs, but it’s still a shame.

G2’s streak was in the top ten of all time, which shows just how crazy the teams above them were. This game against Cloud9 didn’t matter for G2, but all the other teams in the list had games that didn’t matter too. Any streak this long is a rare achievement and should be treated as such.

That it was Cloud9 that broke the streak was a fun surprise, though.

sh1ro, after a 1.70 rating vs EG, dropped a 1.83 rating against G2. After four maps he has a 1.77 rating. ONE POINT SEVENTY SEVEN. Ax1Le broke FaZe in 2022, and sh1ro might have broken G2 in 2023.

Almost like picking Vertigo (where NiKo got a 0.31 rating) against G2 is a good idea. Cough, Heroic.

sh1ro is too good not to win a proper big trophy this year. But until Cloud9 show this same form in a real white-knuckle arena match, we wouldn’t hold our breath.

Elsewhere Outsiders out-boringed fnatic to secure their spot in playoffs, with Jame once again dying less than 10 times in a 28 round win. Inferno and Jame are like oil and water, they just shouldn’t be allowed to mix.

The top three teams of the group, then, should be obvious. G2 should smash everyone left in the ‘mid’ bracket, and Outsiders and Cloud9 have already qualified.

What will be really spicy is the fourth team to qualify. Fnatic look shaky. MIBR have insani. Eternal Fire have a system to back up XANTARES. IHC are always dangerous.

This format is set up for the favourites to go through. So how good would it be if one of them didn’t?

Author: 
NER0

The whambulance calls

A coooooach… A managerrrrrr

  • A bunch of coaches on Twitter - led by m1cks - got all upset because BLAST were only sending players to the RMR, and not coaches.
  • There was a whole lot of anger and crying, but it was fixed within 10 hours of the original tweet. We’re not sure we could have dealt with more self-pity.
  • At least they have HLTV profiles, now.

Clip it and ship it

  • Impressive clip. Now imagine if you weren’t bad at AWPing.
  • We dread to think about what was going on in this game. This can’t be a good one to play in.

Miscellaneous

  • Anyone else feeling… what’s the Portuguese word for deja vu?
  • If in doubt, claim you were just ‘sh*t talking’, and everyone will believe you.
Author: 
aizyesque
GET THE WEEKLY TL;DR ON COUNTER-STRIKE

Unsubscribe anytime

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.