Sent on
April 10, 2023

The big dogs might have got it done elsewhere, but over in Europe, stuff got weird. Like, UKCS did well weird. Let’s take you through what happened at the RMR around the world.

You can’t outrace a Grayhound

We’re not 100% sure how timezones work, but we’re pretty sure the Asian RMR wasn’t supposed to finish after the European one.

In an event plagued by technical pauses - leaving some players visibly frustrated - it took serious mental strength to hold strong and qualify. Sadly for the above player, that wasn’t the case.

Imagine having to play the same game over six hours just to lose a decider a day later. Eesh.

Unfortunately for Rare Atom, sometimes sh*t happens. Every single TO has had to deal with tech issues and being told that ‘this is the worst Major production ever!!!’ every single time, with those saying it appearing to have a memory akin to a colander.

The Asia RMR wasn’t ran particularly well, mind you.

Still, Grayhound and The Mongolz (previously IHC) won’t mind. Well, they will, but they won’t care that much. Because they qualified. If that wasn’t obvious.

Nice clean sentence from us there.

Grayhound’s domestic dominance continued as they dropped just one map, against The Mongolz, en route to immediate qualification, while The Mongolz had to take on Rare Atom for the last spot. Rare Atom, by the way, took down Lobanjica and D0cC (yes, those ones) to make it there.

Rare Atom’s Major woes continue; they’ve struggled to qualify for the last few and were soundly beaten for the last spot here. Last time out, they failed to even make the RMR - so at least it’s an upgrade from that.

Still, it’s always nice to see an Aussie team at the Major. Apparently.

Challenger stage confirmed:

  • Grayhound
  • TheMongolz

Notable Eliminations:

Rare Atom, Twisted Minds, TYLOO


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Once more Into the Breach

Illustration by NovaH. Images from Into The Breach.

Better late than never. Just like the Americans in World War Two.

CSGO might be about to come to an end - not because of CS2, but because Englishmen might be good at it. The world is ending, the sky is falling, and Counter-Strike is collapsing.

If it wasn’t enough for fnatic to go 3-0 after beating B8, led by Brummie mezii, they’ll be joined by Into the Breach and an Englishman coaching GamerLegion. Which is a stretch, but not as much as Americans trying to claim FURIA, so shut up.

fnatic romped into Legends with a comfortable 3-0, but Into the Breach had to grind a little bit. Handed a tough tie in game one vs NAVI, ITB were impressive albeit in a close double OT loss.

They came closer to taking a map off of them than FaZe did, anyway.

They clapped Sprout and ground out an impressive win against, though in hindsight… well, it’s not quite as impressive. For a team of their stature, though, it’s a great win, as is cleaning Sprout out so convincingly.

They were then tasked with B8, who’d already lost to fnatic, and stole Ancient from the Ukrainians with a superb T side - but after squandering five match points on Mirage, it felt like their chance might have passed them by.

Fortunately for them, they happen to be Vertigo savants. B8 were blown back, and ITB made history.

They’ll be joined in Paris - but not in a Legends’ Stage spot - by GamerLegion. Due to some weird seeding black magic, ITB were given Legends, but GamerLegion had to face BNE for a spot. And lost.

They didn’t lose much else, mind. After an opening round loss to Apeks, Gamerlegion slapped OG and toppled 1WIN, leaving them up against Falcons wearing some plot armour.

Not enough of it, though. siuhy’s stock continues to rise as he led from the front - literally - with a boatload of entry kills and a chart-topping performance. He, once again, has led a team to a Major with players few would ever have thought capable.

All of them had a key part to play, and GamerLegion once more look like a team you’d like to avoid.


NBK enjoying a dish of revenge

Just about a year ago MOUZ took NBK off the roster after a measly 10 weeks. On friday, he wiped them out with Falcons, 16-8 on vertigo.

Judging by this clip, the victory sounded almost as good as winning a trophy.


The tale of Eagles and Bears

In the wildlands of the RMR, the Eagles and the Polar Bears are on opposite sides of the foodchain. The Eagles fly high and feast whilst The Bears can only get pieces of SAW. Sorry, we’ve been binging David Attenborough recently. What we meant to say was: Bad News Eagles have been flying at the European RMR despite their poor start.

The Eagles shook us by losing their first game to 1WIN, giving us hope to see a Boombl4 redemption and making us think that the Major Season hot shots of BNE had lost their spark. We shouldn’t have doubted them though because they proceeded to sweep anyone who dare step in their flight path. Viperio, Apeks, and even FaZe were all rendered immobile setting BNE up for a seeding meeting with Gamers Legion.

Three maps later, BNE beat GL and secured Legends in Paris. All the while, Virtus Pro was staring longingly at the feast BNE had.

The no-longer-outsiders came into the RMR as reigning major champions with high expectations on their shoulders, so they must’ve been relieved when they won game 1 vs. SAW. So much so that they let their guard down against the Ukrainian B8 squad to go into 1-1 bracket to face Into The Breach.

But surely they couldn’t lose to UK CS right? Wrong, they DID, which prompted shouts of its coming home whilst VP was concerned about going home. So Jame and VP management made a drastic call: Kair0N- goes home and n0rb3r7 comes back in. A move that, as you can imagine, raised quite a few questions on Twitter. But obviously, it proved correct when later they… were knocked out by MOUZ… right.

They looked just as bad if not worse with n0rb3r7 back in the fray and couldn’t even fight the mice from Hamburg. The reigning major champions won’t be at the Paris Major. Maybe Jame needed some more private time ;-)

Major Confirmed:

z - NAVI (3-0)

z - fnatic (3-0)

z - Into the Breach (3-1)

z - Bad News Eagles (3-1, won tiebreaker)

y - GamerLegion (3-1)

y - Apeks (3-2)

y -  OG (3-2)

x - MOUZ (3-2)

x- Contenders, y- Challengers, z- Legends

Last Chance Qualifier (2-3 teams):

FaZe Clan, Team Falcons, B8

Notable Eliminations:

1win, Virtus.Pro, Sprout


A collapse of monumental proportions

Illustration by Andy.

A Ukrainian, an eagle, and a mouse walk into a bar. And beat the crap out of FaZe.

The Intel Grand Slam champions of a few weeks ago were supposed to be at the RMR, but we’re not convinced.

This was some other guys, just renting their jerseys and their likenesses. Where were Twistzz’ headshots, broky and ropz’s 2v5s, or karrigan’s insane mid-rounds?

So how did this even happen? When we left you on Thursday, FaZe were 2-0.

First was a loss to NAVI. Fine, npl had a life event.

Then Bad News Eagles. AGAIN. Maybe they’re a bogey team, but still. This is FAZE. You shouldn’t have bogey teams.

Suddenly FaZe are 2-2, with a low seed (thanks to going 0-3 in Rio) and drawn against MOUZ.

But that’s fine, right? It’s squeaky bum time, sure — but MOUZ have always been the budget FaZe.

Then the game started. And if you took the name badges off, it was hard to tell who was the budget version of who.

At 13-13 on the decider — Inferno of course — the bomb is down on B. It’s a situation we’ve seen ropz and broky clutch a million times before. Two of the best closers in the world, against an off-colour IGL who has 13 kills and 22 deaths.

Who wins? dexter of course.

Still, FaZe get us to overtime. This is the team that don’t lose close games, or at least never used to. One clutch won’t change that, right?

That, though, was in the old days. This time was xertion’s time. It was MOUZ’s time.

FaZe can still qualify for the Major in the Last Chance bracket next week, but there are no guarantees. We really might have a Major without either of the two most recent champions present.

RMR CS is one hell of a drug.


Mhrowback Monday

Throw it back (not like that)

  • Bullying your opponents in warmup so badly they don’t have time to learn smokes is a different kind of evil, Nato…
  • r1nkle is single-handedly redefining the notion of throwback.

🤪 The R in RMR stands for Ridiculous

  • Okayyy boomb4l, nice mousepad. This guy gets laid.
  • Never ever complain about that one hour lasting game again. Ever.

😔 A waste of your work

  • Even though this mod might be irrelevant within now and the summer, it’s still worth checking out.

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