Counter-Strike often parallels real life. After one hell of an evening, such as a Major final victory - or a crazy night out - it’s normal to need a day to properly recover from the hangover.

It’s also true that, as you get older, the hangover may last longer than just a day. Having said that, while we get that karrigan is about as old as they come… this is starting to get ridiculous.

It’s becoming more and more clear that Falcons have a problem, if not more than that. Another early elimination in Beijing - this time in the group stage - really underlined that this past week. With just a mere six weeks or so until the Singapore Major gets decided, something clearly needs to happen.

We think there are three problems with Falcons.

First of all - zonic. Oh, Danny, it just never ends, does it?

Look, we won’t harp on with all the same stuff that everyone else has said, but the more zonic opens his mouth, the more we’re starting to wonder how he’s got such a fat trophy cabinet. If only Falcons had a guy with a bird’s-eye view over the game, who could take a pause - a timeout, perhaps - to turn the team around after a bad start?

Thankfully, if Richard Lewis is to be believed, there is already a plan in place to solve this problem, as zonic will take a step back and be replaced by karrigan. This solution also solves our second problem with the team.

The old man doesn’t have it anymore.

There was a time when karrigan’s 0.90 rating was defensible, because the upside was some damn good calls. In 2026, his 0.75 rating is not, and given recent results, it seems even the upside is gone.

We’re not too surprised by this, to be fair. Looking back at karrigan’s career, a pattern emerges that suggests he, in some ways, is the Roberto Martinez of Counter-Strike. When your team is in trouble, he comes in and fixes it, but once you’re back on track, you can safely sack him, because it just doesn’t get better.

If all else fails, he’s got a spot at G2 if he wants to try his hand at fixing something unfixable.

But with those two problems out of the way, there’s just one left - and it’s not TeSeS. In fact, much like G2’s poor excuse for an AWPer, this one might genuinely be unfixable.

The million-dollar Russian kid.

The post-Major slump from kyousuke has been a growing problem for the team, tournament after tournament, and while our gut reaction to this quote from Mauisnake was that it was clever engagement bait, it’s starting to look more and more like the truth. The kid might just be unteachable, and if he doesn’t change that soon, this might be his individual peak.

“kyousuke probably truly cares about two things: money and Counter-Strike. He has already succeeded at both, so he most likely thinks he's on top of the world”, said Maui, implying he’s getting way too complacent.

And with rounds like this, we’re very much in agreement. The last person to play like that was Jordanian, and where is he now?

We can’t quite believe we’re saying this, but as long as the pickups are sensible, letting zonic, karrigan, and kyousuke all go this winter might end up being an upgrade for Falcons. When was the last time you could say something like that about a reigning Major champion?